Hollaa Guys!!i miss u guys so much..hehe...today i would like to share some information regarding the negative feeling of Regret!!have u ever felt regret when doing something??hurm, whether you are still kicking yourself up for messing up a great relationship, or for not going on that holiday all your mates are now continually raving about, everyone's got their bundle of regrets. am i right??(chewah berbahasa orang putih pulak aku, act aku nak improve my english, so kita sama2 berbahasa orang putih harini ok)..^_*
Regret, by definiton is sadness associated with an error or disappointment. It's a process in which we spin out the various alternate endings a situation could've had: "What If"... At best, regret is a constructive tool that gives us a sting when we've messed up, ensuring that we learn our lesson and don't repeat the same mistakes. At worst, regret becomes an endless, torturous game of 'WHAT IF'. Personified, it'd be like a childhood bully grabbing your hand and slapping you with it, all the way asking "Why are you hitting Yourself?10x".
Clearly, the lesson learnt is preferable to the self flagellation. But unfortunately, many women fixate on their perceived failings, mentally slapping themselves into a crippling state of negativity.
According to psychologist Jacqui Manning, "Everyone has regrets," says Manning. " But does everyone dwell on them 100 percent of the time? NO right?? That's where resilience comes in. some people are naturally strong minded and bounce back from anything and some people need help to learn how to do that."
Dealing with dissapoinment, and regret is like coming to a fork in the road, one way leads downwards to rumination and guilt, the other way leads upwards to a better version of yourself.
Here are some ways on how to deal with regret that i got from CLEO magazine edition February 2011...ENJOY ya!!(@__@)
> Write down your regrets: this clarifies them in your mind
> Examine them: understand the reasons behind your decisons
> Change your toxic thought patterns: for example; " I didn't take that offer and now my life's ruined" with " I did the best that I could with the resources I had at the time".
> Acknowledge that your feel sad or angry with about the situation.
> Make amends: apologise for something you've done.
> Identify lesson: Make sure you learn from regretful experiences - mistakes are fine, as long as they are new ones.
> Develop compassion: understand other people's points of view and emphatise.Have compassion for yourself too.
> Forgive others: Stop condemning yourself and forgive others easily.
> Live free for regret: accept what has already happened, learn your lesson and MOVE ON babe!!^_*
maklumat kucar kacir dari: Schubert Serenade ($_$)